Why It’s So Confusing When He Says He Doesn’t Want to Lose You but Doesn’t Want to Commit. When my boyfriend asked me to be official, he told me about how long he'd been wanting to date me. After we left the first bar, we went to my favourite cheap dive bar. They exist! DO NOT REPLY TO MALE TROLLS!! The moment you say, “This is how I do things and this is what I need…” and he starts getting a little distant, he starts pulling away, if it’s his rules or no rules at all, he just wants to have you around. There are men out there who are tall, cute, highly paid who will treat you well. But, if he won’t commit, he’s saying loud and clear that he doesn’t want a committed relationship. 1) stay with him uncommitted. If he doesn’t know he wants you all the way, he’s not worth your time. If he doesn’t want to call you his girlfriend or put labels on the relationship, it’s a pretty big sign he’s not that serious. But, if he won’t commit, he’s saying loud and clear that he doesn’t want a committed relationship. [new] ... Posted by just now. Holy... thank you. He doesn’t want to commit, but that doesn’t mean he wants you to kick him out of your life. 11. He knew my family. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Is he interested? Show me a guy who isn’t selfish AF - starting to think they don’t even exist. He tells me he would die for me. If he doesn’t know what he wants, it’s because he has yet to find it. HE DOES NOT. If he's not approaching you, or if he's barely making any effort, he's just not that into you. The clearer he is about what he wants, the clearer his relationship decisions will be. If he doesn’t want to call you his girlfriend or put labels on the relationship, it’s a pretty big sign he’s not that serious. With Overwatch dude, I had to force every single conversation. He makes sure to spend time with me every single day even if it’s only a few minutes in passing. But then he tells me that I have a choice and can leave or wait for him. He won't change. Now imagine if your FWB/boyfriend/misbehaving moid would treat her the way he'd treat you. He never lets me go to bed without telling me goodnight and kissing me. If you know that you want someone in your life completely and with a real title on your relationship, don’t feel guilty for walking away from guys who haven’t figured out what they want yet. And you don’t need more than a few days or one week at the outside. If you want commitment and he doesn’t, you have different goals for the relationship. You don’t need to deal with a guy’s issues when you have your crap figured out. It could be anything. My current boyfriend absolutely adores me!! I don’t want to be your boyfriend. He doesn’t expect her to love these things as much as he does, but he still wants to share his passions. I asked him to go on a spontaneous trip to another city and he didn't even hesitate and paid for the Airbnb. • If you don't get any more of his pre-allocated investment in a woman — time, energy, financial. In the same way that you knew how much you wanted this guy from date one, he knew what he wanted with you immediately after meeting you. For example, if he responds with, “Of course I like you. This guy's Reddit post is all about what he wants to know about a girl after he goes on a second date with her. Always tells me he loves me, loves to cuddle, etc. Hollywood movies are full of beautiful 20 something women finding "true love" with a slobby man at least half a decade his junior. Edit: I'll add in some examples so you can see better. We spend all this time, we go on dates, we talk everyday, I mean come on… BUT…” That’s when you know he doesn’t really want you. What I'm getting, is that he has too many problems and doesn't want to feel alone, and wants to have this hope that oh, he still has this girl waiting for him if he gets "in the mood". Picture the most beautiful woman you can imagine. They are so selfish that if you disturb their lives in the slightest negative way, they’ll see red flags and ditch you (remember - we’re all “crazy”) - meanwhile, don’t feel bad because the chances are very high that they will forever be alone. If he can't shell out 50 bucks for a date (or a measly two bucks for coffee), the guy's a man-child. He doesn’t think of you when he’s making decisions. And I probably should just … Then we kind of went back a couple of steps and started getting to know e/o and hang out. Which is why Arianna grande wrote Thankyou Next. Guys want to avoid labels when they’re not that into a relationship and want to keep the status quo. If he's a f*ckboy or just someone who's just too nervous to hang out with you. He will see your value and will treat you accordingly. However, if he does not re-engage after pulling away, then maybe he’s just not that into you. They will push through their shyness, inexperience, shitty romantic experiences, just to ask you out. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. My ex husband acted like it was a chore to talk to me and only had negative nasty things to say to me. he then goes on to marry the next woman he dates within months or <2 years. If he can only spend time with you from x o'clock to x o'clock ever. When he’s leading you on, he does what’s of his best interest. Always takes care of me first in the bedroom. STOP MAKING YOURSELF LOOK LIKE … If a man treats you any less and you've already been seeing him for a month or two months max, cut him off because he will never treat you like his dream girl if he doesn't already treat you like that in the early stages of dating. The third one is so true. You're just on two completely different pages and you're about to get hurt. It’s a scary concept because if you’re impatient you could lose a guy who might be “the one,” but if you’re too patient you could lose years of your life with someone who might be everything you’ve ever wanted, but he doesn’t want you back. A guy who doesn’t know what he wants is probably scared of commitment. There are multiple reasons that this could have happened to them, but commitment-phobes hardly ever know what they want.. It’s his rule or the highway in terms of how you guys engage with each other. He doesn't. Would he cancel on Alicia Vikander to smoke up with his bros? Though they want to be around you and they like you, they’re scared of starting a relationship with you. You don’t need to deal with a guy’s issues when you have your crap figured out. “The moment you become an inconvenience you’re out of there” - be especially aware of this one! He probably does care about you, he does enjoy spending time with you, he does like you … he just doesn’t like you enough. If you are his dream girl, he would treat you the way he would treat a VS model or a Hollywood star. the guy who broke my heart doesn’t know he did it, and still wants to be friends. Press J to jump to the feed. (n.b. 2. if he's just "meh, she's aight" about you he will constantly be looking at other women and, if given the opportunity, he WILL cheat and leave you for someone that he thinks more attractive/more compatible/whatever. Especially since you’re more mature than him in many ways at this stage in life. It's best to simply play the numbers game by dropping a man who's lukewarm about you and then investing your time and effort on prospecting for other candidates. Some guys don’t want a long term relationship. However, his uncertainty could also be a sign of deeper issues and problems that he is not facing. 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